So today was the day I heard the word I've been dreading ... wheelchair.
Yesterday afternoon, what I suppose was inevitable, but didn't expect for at least a few years, happened. I couldn't get up from my chair. This would be comical if for some silly reason, like having too much fun or too much to drink. As it was, I was horrified. No amount of effort could get these legs to push me into a standing position.
Several times through the afternoon and evening, my hubby lovingly lifted me up so I could drag my legs into another room, thanks only to my cane. It was just after dinner when I broke down in tears, no sobs. I was sure I wouldn't be able to get up the stairs to go to bed.
I could probably handle this under somewhat normal circumstances, but with the house still in renovation mode - month 6 - there is nowhere to sleep downstairs. At least, not anywhere near comfortably.
Morning proved my legs only better enough to get me up and down with much effort. I had physical therapy this morning. Admitted to my therapist that my legs feel 'dead.' After having me do a few gentle exercises, she took my husband aside and told him - as if I were not even there - that she was sending request to my doctor for a wheelchair evaluation.
I still can't speak but a few words at a time, and they usually don't make a lot of sense unless you've lived with me as long as my life partner has. So, all I could do is cry.
My second brain/C-spine MRI is tomorrow. It stinks to even say this, but I hope they find the lesions. After reviewing all the medical records (including my LP results that DID test for Lyme's) I have managed to get copies of, I am convinced that yes, I do have Multiple Sclerosis. And it is progressive. Having a mind that leans more toward science - I need to *see* it. I know you're there....show yourself.
How just like my chaotic, upside-down life would it be to end up in a wheelchair from MS before they ever actually SEE my lesions?
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